day 168: God's plans are much better than my plans

day 168: God's plans are much better than my plans

subject: my day

why? I don't have a before and after PHOTO today. I have a before and after mindset. I have mentioned the reason I started this blog is so that I could show up and let God do the rest.

BEFORE: when my head was hitting the pillow last night (or this morning)- I had my day all planned for tomorrow/today.I prayed my son would sleep in and I would get extra shut eye. I had pre-packed his lunch so I was good to go. I could pretty much roll out of bed if I wanted.  I was going to take my son to MDO, I was going to come home and perhaps nap, and then get some much needed work done. I was going to pick up my son, we were going to go to swim lessons, then gymnastics, and then out with a friend for dinner.  It was going to get a lot accomplished and it was going to be a very full day.

AFTER: the reality of my day. After 3 hours of rest. My son was awake at 6am. Asking me to wake up and play. I couldn't go back to sleep. I hopped out of bed. We played, I made breakfast. He barely ate it. I got some stuff done around the house (who knows what- but stuff was done). Then we went into my bathroom because he said he needed a bandaide. And the lights in our bathroom are bright. I tilted his little face to mine. And looked into his eyes to wipe a bit of sleep out of his eye... NOOOOOOOO..... don't tell me, I think he has pink eye? I furiously look at his eyes searching for the signs. Comparing with the other eye. Sure enough, MDO is not happening. coming home to head to bed, is not happening. But I cancelled everything! And scheduled the Dr.'s appointment. As soon as I told him, he said he can't go and needed to go back to bed. 

Everything happens for a reason. Just the other day, a friend gave me a belated birthday gift for Cash. A Dr's Kit. How awesome! I showed Cash the Dr.s kit. We played with everything and he was ready for his Dr. Appointment with Dr. Kit in hand.

The rest of my day was fabulous. I let go, I let God. And when I put my son to bed I came down with the best feeling that this was such a great day!!! I got to spend time with my son, love him and cater to him. And tell him NO when he wanted a toy at target (we went to ge the perscription filled) he proceeded to cry all the way home because he didn't get that toy. And I felt so empowered as a parent the importance of saying no once in a while. The crying was music to my ears. Well- by the time we pulled into the neighborhood I told him he could stop crying.

Earlier this week I felt some choices I made in responding to my son were not the way I wanted to be as a mom. But today I felt like I was redeemed. I tucked Cash in to bed. And he never comes out of his room. But tonight I heard a cough and he had made it all the way to the landing and was peaking around the corner. I went to him and he said- " I need a big hug" I grabbed him and carried him back to bed. He gave me the tightest hugs and the biggest kisses. This is what it is about.

This is what it is about :  showing up and letting God do the rest. So even though most of my posts are images. I rarely get to post about what it means to show up. But I did show up today. And God blessed me amazingly and preciously. He let me know it was a blessing and he let me know I showed up and he did the rest. Oh and I got a bit of work done too. It was not my plan at all for my day- but it was God's plan and it turned out so much better than I could have planned in all my humanity.